|Ore no Imōto ga Konna ni Kawaii Wake ga Nai Volume 03|
|Date of Release||April 10, 2009|
|ISBN Numbers|| ISBN 4048677585|
|Number of Pages||325 pages|
|Previous Volume||Volume 02|
|Next Volume||Volume 04|
- My sister Kirino seems to have gotten an interest in making a story. However, the story she wrote (a cellphone novel?) appears to be the same as an incomprehensible novel written by Kuroneko herself. Sure enough, sparks flew between the two. To add, due to some inexplainable mistake, the cellphone novel Kirino wrote becomes a hot topic on the Internet, and a publisher has offered to publish her work, leaving me with nothing but utter shock. That aside, with the go-getter Kirino calling me for "life counseling", I head out with Kirino to the streets of Shibuya on Christmas day to make a fool out of myself—!? Hey, Kirino! As expected, going out together as brother and sister is really unpleasant.
The third volume of Oreimo begins with a monologue by Kyousuke who tells us that three months have elapsed since the events in the first volume and, despite all of this, his relationship with Kirino hasn’t changed one bit: he hates her and he’s sure she hates him as well. I have already said that this is actually pretty interesting, because until the very end of volume 6 and despite everything else he will continue to claim their relationship is really bad, that it hasn’t changed, and that they hate each other.
This first chapter is also interesting because we get to know more about Kirino’s personality, that of a tsundere, and that can also help understand her relationship with Kyousuke. One day, she’s angry because she was going to meet Saori and Kuroneko and they got five minutes late. She’s complaining about them all the time, and yet we learn that she arrived… one hour early, which shows that she was really looking forward to meeting her friends. Anyway, Saori suggested holding an “anime appreciation party” at Kirino’s house so that Kuroneko can watch Meruru as the two girls are always arguing about their favorite anime (Kuroneko likes Maschera, which is aired in the same time slot as Meruru.
That day, Kyousuke comes back after spending some (quality? lol) time with Manami and finds it’s pretty dark inside, and Kuroneko is sitting there, but not Kirino. It turns out Saori couldn’t come so, there being no “moderator”, they had a fight (about anime again?), but Kyousuke notices that Kirino didn’t kick Kuroneko out, and Kuroneko didn’t leave—that is, they want to be together, but their proud personality doesn’t allow them to be honest! Kuroneko tells Kyousuke the reason she got angry with Kirino, it turns out it wasn’t because of anime, but because Kirino had written a cell phone novel, a medium increasingly popular among teenage girls. Kuroneko complains about the style (full of emoticons, etc.) but above all about the fact that there’s a character modeled after her that gets raped. Kyousuke decides to go see his sister who’s upstairs… playing eroge, of course. She says she actually got angry because she read Kuroneko’s doujinshi. She says it was a very bulky work, difficult to read since she only thought about herself and not her readers and the worst thing is, there’s a character modeled after her who the main character makes her sex slave! (why junior high school girls write about rape or sex slaves, Kyousuke can’t understand) However, Kyousuke notices Kirino actually bothered to read Kuroneko’s doujinshi. She claims it was to be able to criticize her, but he knows well she did it out of friendship.
Kyousuke goes downstairs and decides to watch Meruru with Kuroneko, an unsettling experience since the DVD version isn’t censored and it’s a little awkward to be watching an anime with half-naked magical shoujo lolis together with a girl. Kuroneko starts saying why she doesn’t like it, just as Kirino comes downstairs. They start arguing about anime, again. This is actually pretty interesting, since Kuroneko likes darker animes while Kirino is like me (and I guess many of my readers) and likes anime that, just as she describes Meruru, are about “friendship”, and of course have cute girls. Kuroneko criticizes its apparent lack of plot and the fact that it has lots of fanservice. Kirino’s reply: it’s not our problem if your anime doesn’t sell well. And you are just too picky.
But at any rate, Kyousuke managed to make the two girls spend the evening together, so all’s well that ends well. Before leaving, however, Kuroneko asks Kyousuke why he bothers to do so much for his sister, when she treats him like that. Kyousuke replies he doesn’t understand himself. “Are you a siscon” “No!!” Then Kirino kicks him “You are sick”. Kuroneko asks “Then are you a masochist?” “No!!! I guess… it’s because we’re siblings after all!” “I understand…” Kuroneko replies, “you are a good brother. I’m jealous” Kirino looks puzzled. “Could it be that you like him?? You have such bad taste” “Don’t get me wrong. I don’t like this boy at all. That’s like a bad joke. I couldn’t be attracted to a boy who doesn’t’ even wear nekomimi. He isn’t handsome at all, he’s just plain and looks like a guy who won’t ever be something in life. He’s like 100,000,000 light-years away from my ideal type” How cruel!! thinks Kyousuke.
In Japan, Christmas Eve has a particular tradition associated with it: it’s the night for couples, and thus it’s no wonder that the ubiquitous love hotels are all booked. As Kirino is going to take a shower in a love hotel room, Kyousuke sits on the bed, pretty tense. “And don’t peek” says Kirino.
What? No, this is not a preview from volume 7. This is still the third volume. To find out how Kirino and Kyousuke ended up in a love hotel on Christmas eve, we need to go back at the beginning of December.
One day, Kirino asks Kyousuke for another counseling session. Kyousuke asks what it is, and as usual our Kirino turns the tables on him and tells him that if he wants to know he should prostrate before her. He doesn’t, but she stills tells him to be grateful because she’s going to tell him what the matter is: it turns out her novel has become really popular on the net, and popular novels may be published. “Is that rape novel so popular?” Asks Kyousuke, puzzled. “Yes, isn’t it awesome?” replies Kirino who seems to be OK with it being called “a rape novel”. She tells him that a person from the publishing company has arranged a meeting with her.
“Was it a guy?”
“Yes… what, are you worried about me? Haha, you disgusting siscon. But I’ll let you come with me if you insist”
Kyousuke realizes that Kirino is actually scared of going alone, and she wants him to go with her. To tease her, he tells her he won’t be going with her then, and she just angrily replies “Do as you like” However, Kyousuke tries to picture Kirino going alone and meeting some random guy, and immediately says he’ll go. “What, why should I take you with me? Say at least ‘please’” replies a tsundere Kirino. They go to the publishing company and she’s been asked to wait for that editor in the lobby, so she tells Kyousuke to come at once if she sends him an empty SMS, which would mean she’s in trouble—that is, she’s actually uneasy!
Kirino and the publishing company guy leave the building and go to a café, with Kyousuke trailing them. After the meeting, Kirino just says to Kyousuke “What, why are you still here”. At any rate, she’s been asked to write a new novel, and she wants to go to Shibuya to gather materials, and she’s taking Kyousuke with her. Since their parents will be on a date on Christmas Eve, they decide to go that day. Manami also asks Kyousuke to come to her house for Christmas, and the poor osananajimi is dejected when Kyousuke tells her he already has plans, but doesn’t want to give her any details.
Shibuya, 24th December. Kirino and Kyousuke are going to follow the same steps as the protagonist in Kirino’s novel. If this is a simulation, should we hold hands? Asks himself Kyousuke, but Kirino has other plans. She wants him to be run over by a dump truck, since the first boyfriend of the protagonist dies that way. What’s the matter with this novel?!?! He isn’t really willing to do so, so they head for a department store where the next scene takes place. One month after her boyfriend was killed, the protagonist gets a present from her new boyfriend. And in fact Kirino has already even chosen the present Kyousuke is going to buy her, as part of the simulation! But 30,000 yen is too much for Kyousuke, as it turns out that, in the novel, the protagonist is dating a young, wealthy CEO… what a lolicon! exclaims Kyousuke, but Kirino says that this kind of stories is very popular among teen girls, as they want to date guys older than them, since guys their age are too immature.
“What about you?” asks Kyousuke
“Me, I’d date at least a guy in his second year at high school“
Anyway, the CEO was actually married and his wife caught him cheating on her with a junior high student, so he dumped the protagonist. She’s then very sad (although Kyousuke claims the one who must be really sad is that guy’s wife, being cheated on with a 13-year-old girl!) Unhappy, Rino engages in compensated dating. Kirino and Kyousuke will now simulate a date with her next boyfriend, a boy who is poor, which means that Kyousuke can actually buy her a cheaper present. Meanwhile, Kyousuke decides to take a look at Kirino’s notes since the novel seems too crazy to begin with.
“Main character: Rino. 13 years old. Normal and cute (only half as cute as me) A very pure girl, who thinks love is very important. Easily hurt (what, didn’t she even engage in compensated dating?) She has a very cute little sister. Her name is Shiori-chan (and how does even an imouto fit in this story?)
Boyfriend 1. Name Tetsu. He’s suddenly run over by a dump truck. He’s a little wild sometimes, but he’s also kind. It’s his first time dating a girl, so he isn’t used to it. (Isn’t this cute?)
Boyfriend 2. Name Kazu. 32 years old. A young CEO at a venture firm. Has wife and kids. Both the company and his wife learn he was dating a junior high student so his social life is ruined. Dumps the protagonist. He kills himself? He’s very good at sex (why is a junior high school student writing about a guy being good at sex? Looks hot in a suit. He’s just fooling around with the main character, but he also gets serious some times. (Isn’t it cool for the main character to have such a boyfriend?)
Boyfriend 3. Name Toshi. Very cool. His family is actually rich, but he can’t use his parents’ money so he’s poor. Has a part-time job. Second year at high school. He’s good at playing the guitar and is in a band. Blond hair. Top student. Captain of the soccer club. He’s very kind and worries a lot about her. He likes her very much but won’t admit it. He never gives up.
He finally opens his heart and dates Nori, who gives up compensated dating. But one day Toshi is run over by a car and loses his memory. But Rino stays by his side and he falls in love with her once more. But one day, Rino is raped, but Toshi continues loving her and supports her. But one day Toshi is diagnosed with leukemia and is in hospital, so Rino feels lonely and cheats on him with his best friend who had always liked Rino. But Toshi learns of it, and she decides she loves Toshi after all, even if he’s sick, so she dumps his friend. That night, his friend is killed by a motorbike. In the end, Toshi is healed through the power of love. Happy ending”
Kyousuke’s reaction is “what the hell is this novel?”, but Kirino is really proud of it, and claims that stories like this are very popular, especially if they have happy endings.
However, Kyousuke poses an interesting question. Why does Toshi do so much for that bitch? Kirino’s reply: “because he loves her, of course”. For some reason, Kyousuke gasps.
Anyway, now they go to see a concert, and after it Kirino goes to a convenience store, and she returns with a bucket… which she pours over her head. Kyousuke asks her why she’s done such a stupid thing, it being so cold outside, and she says Rino waits for Toshi after the concert, even if she knows he won’t come, and gets drenched in the rain. This is the reason they end up in a love hotel: so Kirino can get a shower… as this is what, precisely, happens in her novel. Kyousuke however is very nervous. After all, Rino and Toshi didn’t probably check out of the love hotel without doing something first… While Kirino takes a shower, he gets a call from Manami, wondering if he could go to her house after he finishes doing whatever he had to do. He admits he’s with Kirino. “A date?” Asks Manami. “No no, we just went shopping, to a concert…” “Well, Kyou-chan, that’s a date, isn’t it?” By the way, nothing happened in the love hotel. What a pity!
Kirino has come down with a bad cold, and Kyousuke, as usual, is worried about her, even if he still claims, and will continue to claim, that he hates her. He goes to her room to make sure she’s eating properly, and he finds that she seems to be depressed. It turns out that her novel, called Maisora (妹空, which of course contains the kanji for little sister!), has been published in hardcover format. Kyousuke congratulates her, but she tells him that the author is not her, but one by the pen name of “Rino”, the same name as the main character in Kirino’s novel. In fact, the phone number the editor she met gave her has turned out to be fake.
Kyousuke asks her what she’s going to do, and she says that she will do nothing. Kyousuke gets angry at her defeatism, and he wonders why he’s even worried about the sister he hates so much. Could it be that all along he didn’t hate her but… no, impossible. But whether it’s possible or impossible, the following day he meets Saori and Kuroneko and asks them for advice. By the way, another one person who claims to hate Kirino is Kuroneko, although Saori tells Kyousuke that Kuroneko was very worried about Kirino during Winter Comiket, which Kirino couldn’t attend due to her cold.
After hearing Kyousuke’s story, Saori is surprised he’s willing to do so much for his sister. “As I thought, your relationship isn’t just a mere brother-sister relationship” “That’s not it!” Shouts Kyousuke. “Then, Kyousuke-shi… are you a masochist?” Precisely what Kuroneko told him the other day.
Kyousuke suspects that someone got the business card of a real editor to steal Kirino’s password, since the original was on the website. Funnily enough, Saori says she actually has some connections in that publishing company, and she can arrange a meeting with an editor. Kuroneko volunteers, and she will also take the chance to submit her doujinshi. They pretend to be brother and sister, who have written the doujinshi together, and Kuroneko takes the chance to start calling Kyousuke “oniisan” — something she will continue to do in future volumes, until she becomes Kyousuke’s kouhai!
They meet the editor whose name was on the card that Kirino was given—Kumagai Ryuusuke, alias pudding (he loves pudding because it looks like boobs… what a perverted old man!) And obviously, he’s not the guy Kirino met that day. However, they can’t just bring up the subject yet. Kumagai says he read Kuroneko’s doujinshi and, unfortunately, they can’t publish it. Although it has some good points (he especially liked the original character named… Kirino, a hard blow for Kuroneko!), all in all it’s not good enough. He shows Kuroneko her draft full of corrections in red pen, and Kyousuke notices she’s about to cry.
“You bastard!! There’s no other way of saying it? Who do you think you are, making other people’s little sisters cry?” Kuroneko, still pretending they are siblings, adds “I’m sorry my brother has gotten so mad. When it comes to his little sister, he gets too carried away”
Kyousuke apologizes and Kumagai tells Kuroneko, however, not to give up—but next time she shouldn’t arrange a meeting using her connections but use the normal channels.
They couldn’t talk about Kirino’s novel that time, but they return for a second time, this time with evidence about Kirino being the author of the novel. They have already talked to the editor when the person who calls herself “Rino” comes. She’s a woman in her 20s called “Iori Fate Setsuna” (Fate because she has a quarter of foreign blood), a name she hates since it sounds like an anime character! Something that, during that day, Kuroneko and Kyousuke will use to annoy her. Kumagai explains the situation to her—Kyousuke and Kuroneko, “siblings”, claim that their little sister wrote Maisora. Kumagai says he’s Fate’s ally and that, if they are unable to prove it, they will forbid them from coming to the office again.
They learn from the editor that Fate has been submitting drafts for 10 years and was never successful, something Kuroneko wastes no time in mentioning. Kyousuke also shows the pics they took during their date. However, this isn’t of course enough, and Fate attacks: “I guess your silly sister just read my novel, saw the pictures she took and thought she had written it herself, and you two siscons just went along with it”
By the way, as Kyousuke checked the pictures and papers he had brought, he saw that Kirino drew several pictures of him, with footnotes such as “Kyousuke didn’t have enough money and is pathetically apologizing to the shop assistant” “He finally bought me some cheap earrings, but he has no fashion sense at all and took him forever to choose” “When I poured the bucket over me the idiot got so angry. What a siscon! wwwww” “He saw his sister in a bathrobe and got excited! Is Kiririn’s chastity in danger?”
When it looks like they’ve run out of evidence, however, Kyousuke has an ace up his sleeve. It turns out that the website has two sections, both with different password. One for works you publish, and another for personal use, where Kirino has the draft of her second novel, and both having different passwords, Kirino can still log in. That day, Fate was going to actually bring the draft of the sequel, and Kumagai has already read both. His assessment is that the draft Kyousuke brought is written by the “real” Rino.
Fate tells them how she’s been trying to become a professional writer for 10 years, and how she hates how people like the real author of Maisora, who know little about the art of writing, can be so successful. Kuroneko also agrees, since she’s been working so hard to become a good writer, and yet someone like Kirino is successful while she isn’t. Kyousuke also realizes that he’s like Kuroneko, always living in his sister’s shadow. The perfect Kirino who can do everything: she’s a top student, a model, a successful writer, an athlete. He wonders if he didn’t hate her, at least in part, because he was jealous of her talents.
In fact, Kyousuke tells both Kuroneko and Fate that they aren’t that useless—it is Kyousuke himself that is pathetic. They’ve been working hard, but he hasn’t. He’s never tried. He understands that both Kuroneko and him didn’t do this for Kirino, whom they hate, but for themselves, to satisfy themselves. He goes as far as crying. He begs Fate to return the novel to Kirino, the results of all of his sister’s efforts. Fate is surprised. “Didn’t you just say you hated your sister?”
Kyousuke admits to himself that he’s always been trying to convince himself that he hated Kirino, although in reality he doesn’t really understand what he feels. Meanwhile, Kumagai tells both Fate and Kuroneko not to give up, and even if they can’t become pros, they should at least enjoy writing what they like. They will always find someone who likes it.
Back at home, Kyousuke tells Kirino about what happened. Kirino by the way announces she will stop writing after the second volume of her novel. Kyousuke is shocked. With so many people trying for years to become pros, she’s going to give up so lightly? She claims there are other things she wants to try, although Kyousuke thinks it’s just so she can enjoy some new eroge. Kyousuke also mutters “I’m sorry for everything until now” “What?” “Nothing, forget it”
It’s now February, six months since they met Kuroneko and Saori, and they are holding the second anime appreciation party. As usual, Kuroneko and Kirino are arguing, and suddenly Kuroneko attacks “By the way, your brother confessed to me and told me he loves me” Kyousuke denies it immediately, Saori bursts out laughing, but Kirino remains strangely silent, and just says “how disgusting”. Kyousuke thinks she reacted like that because she’s afraid of losing her friend Kuroneko to him.
At the end of the novel, Kirino tells Kyousuke there’s another counseling session she wants to hold, and that it will be the last.